Creativity Pays

Before I had my son, I planned on returning to work. Two weeks into motherhood, with my baby in my arms and tears in my eyes, I resolved to stay home despite the fact it didn't make much sense, financially speaking. Even though so many able women manage to work outside the home and still care for their children, I could not ignore the desires that the Lord had planted in my heart at nineteen. God's plans are not subject to our present circumstances, I've learned, and somehow I'm still at home six weeks later. I'm still in my home six weeks later. We're still eating six weeks later. Praise the Lord, we still have gas in the car six weeks later.

I'm confident the Lord will provide for our needs, but I do not think that entails sitting on my couch and waiting for cash to float out of the sky. God has given me certain skills and abilities for a reason, just as he has given all of us different talents and strengths. God blessed the Proverbs 31 woman for her hard work and dedication to caring for her family. I look to her example while staying at home with my son.

She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.

One of my projects is making afghans and other items to sell in my store on http://www.etsy.com/. I use many different mediums, but crochet is my niche. I love the way I feel after I finish an afghan or bag -it breaks up my routine and I feel productive. When you have a newborn, life is a 3-hour track on repeat and it seems like nothing gets done!

Etsy is a marketplace for all things handmade: the conglomeration of items available on Etsy is mesmerizing. If I wasn't trying to make money, I'd be shopping!

How can you take your skills to the marketplace?

Mattress Rejuvenation

Eric and I sleep on a very old bed. It was my bed before we got married, and it was my parents' bed before that. In its heyday, it was a pretty luxurious mattress, but 15+ years of sweet dreams have taken their toll. The bed sags in the middle like a hammock, leaving my husband very sore in the morning. Towards the end of my pregnancy, he took to sleeping on the floor on a piece of memory foam. He didn't fit in our queen size bed very well anyway, considering I was taking up so much space with my large pregnant belly and 52 pillows. Then he got accustomed to the floor in the other room during the first few weeks after Micah was born. I started to miss him a lot. We really wanted a new mattress, but they are much too expensive for us right now.
Last night my dad and Eric went to Menards and picked up a 3/4" 4x8' piece of particle board for $10 and brought it back home. They trimmed it and stuck it in between the mattress and box spring. It's like a brand new bed! Last night I got my hubby back! I sleep so much better when he's there next to me - he keeps the bed warm and I like the sound of him breathing. As I was falling asleep, I thanked God for my two men: my big man on my left and my little man on my right. I am so blessed. This morning I felt great, too. The bed was much more supportive. I can't believe what a difference that board made.

Heritage from the Lord

I have been a mother for six weeks today. My son has stolen my heart with his tiny sneezes, gigantic farts, little coos, big smiles, wiggles, cries and squeaks. It is amazing to watch your child change, learn and develop every day. You take so many skills for granted until you watch this little person slowly work through learning something as simple as a smile. Babies remind you of the simple beauty of humanity and the complexity of creation.

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,

the fruit of the womb a reward.
-Psalm 127:3

Music & Memories

I have pulled up Jennifer Knapp's album, Lay it Down in iTunes. This has always been one of my favorite CDs, but this afternoon I realize it has an even greater place in my heart now. It's the CD I played during the difficult hours of my labor with Micah, and listening to the songs I realize I will never hear these the same way again. Instantly I am taken back into that delivery room, swaying through the pain with my arms wrapped around my husband's neck. He is whispering in my ear. "You're doing such a good job, honey." I hear the monitors beeping quietly in the background. I take a deep breath before the next contraction, and sink farther into my husband's chest while he squeezes my shoulder at my request. The harder he squeezes, the less I notice the intense pressure of the contraction and the calmer I feel. At the peak of the contraction, I'm singing...

Seeing as I found a rock in my pocket

Seeing as I found a glitch in my soul

Make believe won't hide the truth

When judgment falls and it falls on you

Bend a knee my friend, bend a knee
Lay It Down say it's all my fault, all my fault

Say I believe, I believe Lay it down

This the hour of my healing, of my healing, yeah
Pride can break a man right down from iron

Twist him 'round 'round and tatter up a soul

Handprint of God on the small of my back

My second chance, my second chance

I'll bend a knee my friend, I'll bend a knee
Lay It Down say it's all my fault, all my fault

Say I believe, I believe

Lay it down

This the hour of my healing, of my healing, yeah
My heart, my heart redeemed

If it pleases You Love

If it pleases You Love

If it pleases You Love
Lay It Down say it's all my fault, all my fault

Say I believe, I believe Lay it down

This the hour of my healing, of my healing, yeah

Singing a song about humility and salvation in a moment of such instensity.... the lyrics become real. And aside from that, every time I hear Jennifer Knapp now, my heart swells at the thought of the day I met my son for the first time.

Are there any songs that bring back such strong memories for you?

The Marriage Spoiler: The Problem with Complaining

Steve Pavlina is a personal development blogger. He wrote "Personal Development for Smart People." He says,

"Complaining, like all thought patterns, is not mere observation. Complaining is a creative act. The more you complain, the more you summon your creative energies to attract something to complain about. Your complaints may seem fully justified, but realize that whenever you complain, you are placing your order for more of the same. Complaining is not merely about the past. Whenever you make a complaint, realize you are setting an intention — a goal — for the future."

Steve is onto something. Basically what he is saying is if you spend the mental energy on pinpointing the negative in one circumstance, you'll form a habit of detecting the negative in every circumstance. It becomes addictive. Complaining goes beyond an inital negative reaction to an unfortunate event - it ruminates over and over about that event and moves on to surrounding circumstances, until everything looks bleak. It clouds your focus and dampens your mood. Pretty soon it seems like everything is going wrong and you're caught in a vicious cycle.

Complainers are never happy people.

Complaining doesn't just hurt the person complaining, however. Complaining destroys relationships and marriages, too. Lets say your spouse accidentally threw his red shirt in with the whites this morning, leaving all your clean white socks and undies an unsightly shade of pink. Nobody is going to convict you for getting upset. However, if you think about it all the way to work, then tell every coworker what he did, twitter about it, write about the event on your blog, and then whine to your mother-in-law; you are planting a seed of discontent and resentment in your own heart. When you get home from work, not only will you still be upset about that pink load of laundry, but you will discover that throughout the day, you added to your list of complaints about your spouse. You told your coworkers how he said it was not a big deal, you twittered about how "dumb" he is, you blogged about the last time he ruined your clothes in the laundry (that shrunken sweater?), and you told his mom how mean he is when you don't cook the chicken just right. Last night you were married to a wonderful man, but tonight you're married to a jerk. Only he didn't change -- your attitude towards him did. Why? You complained about him all day. Now, not only is your relationship suffering, but you've given your friends and family a negative view of your spouse, which may affect his relationship with them as well.

You may be thinking - how else would I react?

The answer to this problem is to forgive, forget and flatter. Go ahead and express your frustration to your spouse or to whatever problem you are facing. Take steps to fix it if necessary, but after all is said and done, if there is nothing you can do to further improve the situation, put it to rest. If you find yourself in a crummy mood because your socks are pink, for example, make a point to tell your coworkers about something nice your husband did for you in the past week. Then twitter about how sexy he is. Blog about his big promotion. Tell his mom what a nice cook he is. Then come home and realize that your marriage is just too good to take for granted, especially over a load of pink socks and undies. It goes against every impulse, but it works. Focus on the positive, brag about it, blog about it, make a movie about it if you want --- and the negative will melt away (or just won't matter as much.) Your husband will smile and probably breathe a sigh of relief, and so will you.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

--Ephesians 4:29